Open! Open!
Why are you rushing to biology?
Afraid all the good frogs will be taken?
I don't want to run into Agnes.
We were buddied up on a field trip to the planetarium,
and she wouldn't let go of my hand all day.
I mean, you look at saturn's rings once with a girl
and she thinks you're engaged!
Don't sweat it.
Agnes's locker is at the other end of the school.
Oh, hey, Agnes.
Aah!
Ha ha ha ha!
That's not funny.
Why, oh, why was I cursed with these devastating good looks?
Imagine how hard it is to be the handsome twin.
Hey, Agnes.
I'm not falling for that again.
Hi, Cody.
Aah!
Hey, Agnes, Cody was just talkin' about you.
You were talking about me?
Yes. I mean no. I mean, gotta go.
Wait. Look what I did in art class.
It's you and me sitting on saturn's rings.
Wow! That is so--
weird.
But I worked really hard on it.
Yes. And it shows.
I KNEW YOU'D APPRECIATE IT.
Wait till you see the one of us on top of our wedding cake.
[Whoosh]
Where'd he go?
I'm not tellin' you.
5 bucks. Biology.
♪ Here I am in your life ♪
♪ here you are in mine ♪
♪ yes, we have a suite life ♪
♪ most of the time ♪
♪ you and me got the world to see ♪
♪ so come on down ♪
♪ just me and you know what to do ♪
♪ so come on down ♪
♪ it's you and me and me and you ♪
♪ we got the whole place to ourselves ♪
♪ you and me, we got it all for free ♪
♪ so come on down ♪
♪ this is the suite life ♪
♪ we've got the suite life ♪
The coast is empty. Ok.
Here, scamp!
[Barks]
Oh, what a cute doggy!
Does he know any tricks?
Tons. Oh, here's his best one.
Mr. moseby's coming! Hide!
Ooh! I know that one, too!
But he always finds me.
Stop licking me! It's disgusting!
And it tickles.
Ok. So he gets "hide" and "lick" confused.
Now, Madeline, we have strict rules
about dogs in this hotel.
[Ivana barks]
But ivana gets to come in.
She's a tipton.
But my house is being fumigated,
and scamp had nowhere to go.
Please. Look at his little face.
[Whimpering]
Very well. But I don't want my rug soiled.
That goes for all of you.
Oh! Scamp, want to play with ivana?
Uhh! Who let that mutt in?
That mutt happens to be my dog.
Why am I not surprised? Uhh!
It's probably covered with fleas.
Scamp: I DON'T HAVE FLEAS.
Ok, maybe one. But he's only here on weekends.
Ivana: FUNNY AND CUTE. WHY HAVEN'T WE MET BEFORE, DARLING?
Scamp: WE TRAVEL IN DIFFERENT CIRCLES.
Oh, watch!
Rrr-grr-rrr-grr-rrr!
No offense, but your dog's an idiot.
Relax. We ditched her.
There's no way Agnes could climb a 40-foot fence.
Yeah. Yeah.
Hi, Cody.
What took you so long?
Man, she's good.
Hi, Agnes.
Cody, your little girlfriend is so sweet.
My girlfriend?
Oh, I get it. Ok.
Your friend that just happens to be a girl.
Boys.
They're so silly.
So, Agnes tells me you guys have a date tomorrow?
We don't have a date.
Ok. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
What do you call it when one friend goes out to dinner with another friend?
Creepy beyond belief?
Zack, don't be jealous of your brother.
You'll have a special friend someday, too.
Yeah. Well, hopefully my friend won't be from planet whoo!
Well, thanks for stoppin' by.
Gotta go do my homework. See ya.
That's ok, codylicious.
I have to go pick out a dress for our date.
Thanks for the tea, Ms. Martin.
[Chuckles uncomfortably]
What a sweetie! She's a keeper.
Yeah, in the basement.
Mom, I don't like Agnes as a girlfriend.
I'm just the only one in school who wasn't mean to her.
I'm sorry. I misunderstood.
But you are so sweet.
Yeah, I know. And I hate that about me.
Well, I like it about you,
and obviously Agnes does, too.
Maybe you should give her a chance.
That would be the right thing to do, young Cody.
Mom, I don't want to end up like Johnny melnick,
the boy Agnes liked last year.
WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?
He disappeared.
He moved to Arizona.
That's the official story.
Now, now. I'm sure you're just being a little paranoid...
Codylicious.
Oh, this is so romantic.
Do you like it when I feed you?
Yes. Although I could feed myself if you untied me.
But if I untied you,
you might try to run away again.
No, I wouldn't.
And it's not just because you nailed my feet to the floor--
which, by the way, is taking some of the enjoyment
out of this tasty Mac and cheese.
Let me pull those nails right out.
[Screaming]
Man, I just had the scariest dream
in the history of scary dreams.
What was it about, honey?
Aah!
Hi, guys. How'd she get in here?
I let her in. Why?
Kicks.
By the way, you'd better get dressed.
Your wedding's in 10 minutes.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wedding?!
Hi, hubby-wubby.
Told you it would all work out.
[Screaming]
Man, I've been watchin' you scream for 10 minutes.
Why didn't you wake me?
There was nothing on tv.
Well, I'm glad you're having fun.
I was having a nightmare about Agnes.
How am I gonna get rid of her?
Maybe she'll have a lousy time on your date.
After all, you are boring as a stick.
ACTUALLY, WORSE. YOU CAN PLAY WITH A STICK.
Thanks for trying to cheer me up,
but I'm a goner.
Nothing I do bothers her.
That's because you're too nice.
Do somethin' to gross her out.
Sneeze on her. Pick some eye boogers.
Braid your nose hair.
Ew! That's gross!
That's the point. Come on, I'm giving you gold here.
I can't do it.
Being gross is your specialty.
Wait a minute.
WHY DON'T YOU GO OUT ON THE DATE,
pretend to be me, and gross her out?
What do I get out of it?
I'll do all your homework for the next month?
Through college. High school.
Face it, you'll never make it to college.
Good point. Deal.
Oh. Ms. tipton.
I see by my seating chart
you are dining with royalty tonight.
Oh, if I may say so, brava for you.
Lord corcoran is ivana's date.
Oh.
I--oh!
Oh, I--I see
I'll be serving dogs tonight.
UH, IN...WHICH CASE... BRAVO FOR ME!
Snookums, say hi to lord corcoran.
How do you do?
Oh, fabulous. I just won
the English kennel club's best in show.
Who came in second place? A cat?
I think they like each other!
You also think 1 and 1 is 4.
Here's your table.
Beautiful evening, isn't it?
Lovely couple.
Ooh, love the collar.
Menus? Ok, I'm losin' my mind.
Excuse me. Could you play the violin
when my date arrives?
Good idea.
Then I'll ride a unicycle
and juggle on some bananas.
Could you?
Could this evening get any worse?
Yo, dude.
Apparently, it can.
You'd better warn the tables downwind--
I'm feelin' a little gassy.
[Sobs softly]
Cody?
That's my name. Don't wear it out.
Classy place, isn't it?
You look... Different tonight.
No, I don't.
Yes, you do.
It must be your glasses.
Here, let me clean those off for you.
There you go.
Scamp.
Scamp! [Whistling]
We have to find him!
Ok, ok, ok. Think like a dog.
Please tell me you haven't lost your dog in my hotel.
[Chuckles] I haven't lost him.
We're...Playing hide-and-seek, and he's winning.
Oh, and he's really good.
Marco!
[SOFTLY] Pollo!
First of all, that's not hide-and-seek.
Secondly, you don't answer yourself.
And thirdly, it's polo.
Find that dog...
And remove him from the premises,
OR I WILL REMOVE BOTH OF YOU...
Permanently!
POLLO?
Oh, and on mumsy's side,
I had a great- great Uncle
whose human was the Duke of windsor.
HE MAY BE A WINDSOR, BUT YOU ARE A LOSOR.
They're in love.
I smell puppies!
Whatever you smell, I'm not cleaning it up.
Woof.
Hiya, toots.
Scamp.
Gee, I been sniffin' all over for ya.
Who's the stiff?
Shoo! Patrick,
how dare you let a dog in here?
My bad.
Scamp! What are you doing? Ohh!
Come on, puffball, take a walk on the wild side...
Without a leash. Woof!
See you around, loser. Ruff! Ruff!
Ivana! Come back!
Scamp!
Uh, check. [Whines]
Yes, sir.
Ohh!
Oh, yeah! Here we go!
Ohh!
Pasta?
That is so...
Unlike you.
Hey...What happened
to that cute little mole of yours?
Right here. See?
That's meat sauce!
You're not my codykins!
I don't... like to be fooled, Zack.
I'm sorry! It's just that--
I know what's going on! You do?
Of course.
You want me for yourself.
Whoa there, girl!
I coughed on your food!
I pulled a noodle out of my nose.
And strangely...
I loved it.
AND YOU.
But you love Cody!
I did. But let's face it--
you're exciting and-- and unpredictable.
YOU'RE MY LITTLE REBEL.
Agnes likes.
But-- shh!
Don't speak!
FOR I... SPEAK FOR YOU.
I wished I'd shut up!
Open!
Open! Open!
Ohhh...
I'd like you to know
that, unlike you, I'm not enjoying your pain.
Oh, hi, Agnes.
Very funny, but that won't work.
Hi, Zack. Aah!
[Sighs]
Ok, now I'm enjoying it.
Since when is your locker next to mine?
Since I switched with talia mendench.
Thanks, talia.
So you two will be seeing a lot of each other.
Agnes: YES.
And when Zack isn't here,
he's still here.
Welcome to planet whoo!
Oh. And if you like that,
wait till you see the picture
of what our baby's going to look like.
[Whoosh]
Where'd he go?
Nothing you can do will make me tell.
5 bucks. Soccer practice. Ok.
London, our dogs are missing.
I've handed out 300 fliers, and you're on the phone?
I don't need fliers. I just rented a blimp.
In 30 minutes, ivana's picture
will be hovering over all of Boston.
What about scamp?
Get your own blimp.
Anyway, this is all your fault.
MY FAULT?!
You shouldn't have forced ivana to date
that...Lord cuckoo of kumquat
when she obviously liked my scamp.
She doesn't know what she likes!
She's just a child.
And now I may never see her again.
And I may never see scampers again.
Ohhh...I just miss ivana so much.
I can almost smell her favorite food--
steak tartar with chocolaty caviar.
And I can smell scamp's favorite food--
pizza with kibble.
Esteban!
What's on the tray?
The cover. Bye-bye.
Wait!
[Gasps]
Please!
Leave the doggies be!
Where are they?!
They're in love.
Do not separate them because they come from different worlds.
I'll be having you with extra kibble
if you don't take us to those dogs right now.
Zack. Chill.
I MEAN, WE'RE ON THE 23rd FLOOR.
What's Agnes gonna do, fly in our window?
[Loud knocking]
Aah!
[No audio]
MAN! SHE IS GOOD!
Let's cut the ropes!
Don't be ridiculous. She might fall and hurt somebody.
That's a risk I'm willin' to take.
No. There has to be a smarter way to get rid of her.
RIGHT! YOU THINK,
and I'll look for some scissors.
Mr. ambassador, I'm sure you'll be very comfortable
in our imperial suite.
It has 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms,
and 2 dogs makin' kissy-face on the couch?!
Hey, do we walk in on you when you're--
ok, we do.
Ivana! Ohh!
Scamper! Ohh!
Mr. ambassador, please forgive me!
I am so sorry, doggies.
They made me tell.
Poor ivana. Did that big, mean mutt hurt you?
I want these dogs out of here immediately.
[Ivana yelps]
[Growls] Ohh! Ohh!
Bow wow!
Ivana's never growled at me before!
What's gotten into you?
I told you. They are in love.
And if you loved your children,
you would not come between them.
He's right.
We shouldn't let our personal prejudices stand in their way.
Prejudice, smedjudice.
With lord corcoran, ivana's puppies would be champions.
Oh, but Ms. London...
Look at them.
They are such a beautiful couple.
OH...SHE DOES LOOK HAPPY.
AND IF SHE'S HAPPY... AREN'T YOU HAPPY?
Yeah.
Mommy's happy.
I don't know about you,
but I am hearing wedding bells.
Well, this ought to bring mommy down--
[chuckling] Now we're in-laws!
No!
She's coming!
Are you ready for plan "get rid of Agnes"?
I was ready the second I met her.
It's time for the stalker to become the stalkee.
Come in, sweetie.
Hi, zackie.
Hi, aggie.
Thanks for inviting me over.
You know...This is much easier
than scaling the side of the building.
Although you did look beautiful
with those pigeons in your hair.
I did, didn't I?
Yes...
You did.
Step away from my woman!
Cody?!
She's not your woman!
She's mine!
She was mine first!
Guys, guys!
Please!
You know, I've never had
2 boys fighting over me before.
Agnes likes.
Ignore him.
Look what I've made you, my beloved.
These are our children--
Zack junior...
And Agnes junior.
I made them out of peanut butter and jelly.
That is so sweet.
Oh! And this is our dog--
zagnes!
Wrong! Our children
will be Agnes junior and Cody junior!
And our dog's name is agnody.
Right, honey bear?
She's not your honey bear!
She's my sugar muffin!
Tell him you're mine, cutie patootie!
No one tells my Rosie posie what to do!
Aah! That popping noise you hear?
Yeah, that's my shoulder.
I'm sorry. Let me
rub it for you, sweetie tweetie.
No one touches my lovey bunny but me!
Oh, yeah?!
Yeah!
[Both shouting]
Guys! Guys! Stop it!
I--I can't stand this!
What's come over you two?
You're right.
We're behaving disgracefully.
We wouldn't blame you if you walked right out
and never spoke to us again.
Yeah. We're so disgusting,
you might want to move out of state.
Here, let me get the door for you.
Unless you prefer the window.
Wait a minute.
Are you two trying to get rid of me?
Well...
Yes!
We're trying to show you how annoying it is
to have someone who won't leave you alone.
Oh.
I see.
I didn't realize I was being such a bother.
Uh...Agnes...
What Zack is trying to say is...
You come on a little too strong.
NO...WHAT Zack IS TRYING TO SAY
is...Leave.
The point is...
You can't force someone to like you.
It takes time for a friendship to grow.
You mean...If I hadn't pushed so hard,
you would've liked me?
It's...Possible.
Thanks for being honest with me, Cody.
You're really a nice guy.
So I've been told.
And that's why...
I'll wait for you.
Huh?!
So you just go out there
and you sow your wild oats.
And then... When you're ready...
I'll be right out there on that scaffolding.
Bye, codykins.
Hmmh.
I did it again, didn't I?
Yep.
Why, oh, why was I cursed
with this incredibly kind and gentle nature?
You gotta stop bein' such a pushover! Ok.
Now, go do my homework like you promised. Ok.
But you're only getting a "b."
Yes! My first "b"!
I'm going to name my puppy
Maria consuelo Marguerita francesca del cielo.
I think we'll name this one scruffy.
YOU CALL THOSE NAMES?
Prince percival persimmon du lac.
NOW, THAT'S A NAME.
Sure...If you want him to get beat up at the dog park.
What part of "no dogs in the lobby"
don't you understand?!
Now, whoever's father does not own this hotel is fired.
Oh, look at that wittle facey!
Hoo hoo hoo!
How cute!